Taking a Step Back (Again)

I'm down with the flu again and it feels terrible. This morning, I was up from 1 A.M. to 4 A.M. because of a really bad headache. 

Because of my headache, I thought I was going to get blind. There was a lot of pressure in the area of my head near my eyes. Whenever I would lie down and try to sleep, I felt like all my blood pressure was going to that area and might eventually make my eyes pop out. Good thing it didn't. But, it was a really terrible headache. 

From 1 to 4 in the morning, I was thinking why I became sick. I always  try to figure out the reason whenever I get sick. I thought:

"Maybe it is because of the changing weather."

"Maybe it is because I haven't eaten much fruits lately."

"Maybe it's because I have really been exhausted for the past couple of weeks."

But then, I realized it was none of those three. 

It was simply because there are some things in my life, especially at work, that are not aligned with my passion, my purpose, and my mission. They have been giving me a lot of emotional stress lately. And I'm a firm believer that a brokenness in your soul will lead to physical brokenness. 

I learned these during one of the sessions at the Feast:

  • Jealousy causes oncological problems (the ones which can possibly lead to cancer). 
  • Hopelessness causes lung problems (which explains my coughs and colds). 
  • Rigidity causes migraines. 
  • Lying causes alcoholism. 
  • Anger causes insomnia. 
  • Aggressiveness (the bad one) causes gastric ulcer. 
  • Conflicts cause thyroid enhancement. 
  • Anxiety causes digestive and skin problems. (Yes, I'm having rashes again.)
  • Cruelty causes epilepsy and asthma. 
  • Greed causes obesity. 

That's why, right now, I'm taking a step back (again) to evaluate my life and how I'm living it. 

Maybe it's time for me to have more courage, to take chances once again, and to pursue the things I want to do. 

Maybe courage is the medicine I need. 


P.S. The reason why I don't take medicines when I'm sick is because I want to listen to what my body is telling me. And it's telling me to slow down and have more courage once again.