When Tempted to Believe that God Isn't Here

Every Sunday, I take a break from writing about WorkLife, and Changing the World. Instead, I write about my imperfect understanding of God’s perfect love as my personal mission to spread His word and His love and to make a difference. You can read more Mission posts here.

Can I just pray with you today?

“Father,

Sometimes, I’m tempted to believe…

… that You are not here.

… that You are not with me during the dark times.

… that all my achievements are because of my own abilities, circumstances, and luck.

… that You have no hand in everything that is happening.

… that everything just happens by accident.

… that everything just happens.

Yet, how many times have You overwhelmed me with Your presence?

How many times have You helped me in ways I didn’t expect and just when I needed it the most?

How many times have I overcome my trials and sufferings because You were always there to strengthen me?

How many times have You comforted me when I had no one to run to—when You were the only One I could run to?

How many times have You encouraged me when I was about to break?

How many times have You lifted me up when I stumbled?

How many times have You surprised me with Your blessings I never expected?

How many times have You taught me a lesson through my failures and delays?

How many times have You proven that Your plans are way better than my plans? (You know what I’m talking about, Father. Thank You.)

How many times have You proven to me that Your timing is just perfect? That there are no delays? That even if I’m the cause of my delays, You can turn things around in an instant?

How many times have You proven to me that nothing happens by accident? That nothing just happens? That You have a hand in everything? That You have a reason for everything?

How many times have You assured me that even when bad things happen to good people, You will redeem them in ways we could never understand like how You redeemed Jesus? Your ways are higher than our ways.

How many times have You forgiven me and given me peace when I couldn’t forgive myself?

How many times have I felt Your unconditional love for me even when I do not deserve it?

Father, sometimes, I’m overcome by my weaknesses. I’m overcome by my sins. I’m overcome by my doubts. I’m sorry. But, I know You will never tire of forgiving me and comforting me and loving me.

Thank You, Father. Words are not enough to tell You how grateful I am right now. To the best that I possibly can, I want to say, “Thank You.”

I love You, Father. My love will never be perfect. But, I will love You as much as I possibly can.

From this day forward, there is only one thing I seek and that is You. Should I fail from time to time because of my human weaknesses, I know You will be there to help get back on the right track. Thank You, Father, and I love You.

There’s only one thing I desire and that is to be with You all the days of my life.

In Jesus’ Name, amen.”

“Seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness and all these things will be given you besides.” — Matthew 6:33

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[31 Day Challenge Update] As much as I want to wake up at 4:30 AM, it's already 3:38 AM and I'm just about to sleep. I don't like making promises. But, I will really try again on Monday. I'm really sorry.